This is my second life coaching session with coach Jeremy (thepacerco.com/strugglz). We talked about what makes me happy, what is the kind of human interaction I’m searching for. And it eventually went very emotional. I’m very grateful that I recorded this very rare experience and glad to share it with you.

本期记录了我和我在纽约的邻居，life coach生活教练Jeremy(thepacerco.com/strugglz)，进行的第二次咨询。从谈论零食上瘾，到什么让我开心，到闭上眼睛想象我理想中的即兴舞会，不断冒出的与人相处中的渴望与担忧，然后自怜自伤，然后平和看待……

比第一次咨询更走心（走心到失控？）。一次独特的经历。

2:25 My problem with snacking: a story like most women, starting with body image issues, in the end, it’s about resting my mind.

4:10 But…What’s wrong with snacking?

4:30 What makes you feel good? Energetic body, creative ideas, discovery, good smell, and sunshine.  Human interaction? Sometimes.

6:02 What makes an engaging conversation for me? Intellectually or emotionally engaging. Or just some wild talks.

6:58 It’s usually other people expressing their emotions. I am usually not sensitive to my own emotion.

8:25 I have the prior that i will have boring conversations. How to inject something new into the coaching conversation? I feel there’s nothing more to talk about myself.

9:35 I used to blog to "teach" what I’ve learned, but now I do a podcast to share what I don’t know.

10:33 I don’t feel a lot of emotions because my life is pretty boring. And it is NOT okay to live a boring life.

Dilemma? I expect to feel more in social interactions which will make me get away from boredom. Yet I don’t always expect interesting interactions happening.

13:25 I feel like with Americans the topic is always around superficial stuff. Jeremy: Do you know that’s American’s opinion on Chinese people as well?

15:25 Ultimate challenge: how to get to a deep connection with others? Jeremy: start with relaxing your body.

16:16 Visualize the kind of human interaction I want. I want to dance freely. But when interacting with other people, who can I trust so I won’t be nervous?

19:32 Check-in: what is our body reaction? Jeremy’s head feels confused. My chest feels the tension and anxiety. And crying tendency surfaces.

21:07 Let’s make the imagination concrete: what would be the playlist for my dance party? I’m still full of worries: will I confuse people with my unconventional choices, but in fact, it could only be my confusion.

24:11 Past experience. A drawing party as a metaphor for life. Others are watching their TV and chatting, leaving myself alone at the table.

28:45 Check-in: what is our body reaction? Jeremy feels there’s light turning on then off all the time. Feels like I’ve always trying to hide.

30:11 What would happen if you cry right now? Is it okay to cry in front of a life coach? To cry for yourself? It brings back to my distant memory of lonely, moody, and definitely not boring teenage years. Glad to meet you again.

34:24 Final word. And the next episode: how to become a life coach yourself?